Chapter One: She Nearly Went to Join Her Great-Grandmother

“Mianmian! Ruan Mianmian?”

“Ruan Mianmian, what’s wrong? Wake up!”

The panicked and frightened voices of her colleagues echoed in Ruan Mianmian’s ears.

She could hear them calling her, but she couldn’t respond.

Her heart felt as if it were being squeezed mercilessly by an invisible hand—so much pain she couldn’t breathe.

It was as if someone were strangling her, her neck gripped tight, cutting off her air.

It was like drowning, water flooding her lungs, the more she struggled to breathe, the more water rushed in.

Ruan Mianmian thought that in the next moment, she would suffocate and die.

She hadn’t even recovered from the dull pain in her heart and temples, like oxygen deprivation, when another voice echoed in her mind:

[Ding! Host’s vital signs detected at critical threshold. Conditions met for mandatory binding to the ‘Longer Life Through Roasting System.’]

[System binding in progress… 1%… 10%… 60%… 100%!]

[Binding complete!]

A cold, emotionless mechanical voice yanked Ruan Mianmian out from the abyss of darkness.

Gasping for air, her heart thudded wildly and out of rhythm in her chest, but at least she’d shaken off that deadly suffocation.

She had almost died from working overtime all night, revising proposals—nearly dropped dead and gone to meet her great-grandmother!

Lifting her head, she met the worried gazes of her colleagues—some anxious, some just watching the show, and… the shiny, thoroughly displeased, chubby face of her supervisor, Li Hao.

What was going on?

What had just happened to her?

Had she nearly died?

And what was with that cold mechanical voice in her head?

Before she could sort it out, Li Hao’s voice exploded in her ear:

“Ruan Mianmian! Who are you playing dead for? Where’s the proposal I told you to revise? The client’s waiting! Is this what the company pays you for—to sleep?!”

Spit nearly flew onto her face.

His trademark “Mediterranean” bald patch gleamed under the fluorescent lights, and with his twisted expression, he looked just like an oily, hard-boiled egg.

The entire office went dead silent. No one dared to speak.

A nameless fury shot up through the crown of Ruan Mianmian’s head.

That damned old baldy! It was clearly his fault the proposal had to be redone—he’d lost the critical data himself, and now he was pinning it on her?

Just as her ingrained instincts as a corporate drone urged her to swallow her anger, that cold electronic voice sounded in her head again, this time with an undeniable order:

[Warning: Newbie Task Triggered! Host must immediately launch a verbal attack of sufficient intensity against target ‘Li Hao’ to meet system standards. Time limit: 30 seconds. Failure penalty: immediate cessation of heart function.]

A red countdown appeared before her eyes: 29… 28… 27…

Heart stops?!

Ruan Mianmian felt the blood in her veins turn to ice.

She stared at Li Hao’s mouth, flapping and spewing saliva, at that dazzling bald patch under the lights.

Having just clawed her way back from the brink, she never wanted to face that terror and despair again.

She had no intention of dying young!

To hell with this job!

To hell with patience!

She’d almost died pulling an all-nighter—because of this damned baldy!!

“The proposal?” Ruan Mianmian’s voice trembled from the aftereffects of oxygen deprivation and adrenaline.

Bracing herself against the desk, she forced herself upright, knuckles white, and, mustering twenty-five years of courage, pointed straight at the shine on Li Hao’s head.

“Baldy Li! Those few hairs on top of your head are about to be plucked out by your own hand, and you still dare to yell at me about the proposal?”

“If you hadn’t thrown out the key data like trash yesterday and then broke my computer, would I have had to stay up all night suffering with you?”

“The proposal? Wait for it! I’ll burn a copy and send it to you in the afterlife—you can revise it at your leisure down there!”

Dead silence.

Absolute, utter silence.

Everyone stared at Ruan Mianmian.

It was as if the whole open-plan office had been frozen in time, dozens of wide eyes fixed on her, shocked and awestruck.

Ruan Mianmian—true to her name—was infamous for being soft and timid!

What had gotten into her? Was she possessed or had she swallowed explosives?

She dared to roast Baldy Li? And right to his face, even calling him by his nickname?

Did she have a death wish?

Li Hao’s face, greasy and red, now turned the color of raw liver.

He pointed at her, “You… you… you…” but could not force out a second word.

The scene was both comical and unsettling.

[Ding! Congratulations, host. Newbie task complete! Precision strike at opponent’s weak point; language extremely insulting. Reward: 50 points, +5 days to lifespan, and a Newbie Gift Pack ×1.]

Ruan Mianmian, hearing the mechanical voice, tried to communicate with it mentally, “What’s the use of these points?”

[Host may use points to upgrade the system or exchange them for money. 1 point equals 1,000 yuan. Would host like to convert points to cash now?]

Without hesitation, Ruan Mianmian replied, “Convert.”

System upgrades could wait. She needed to see if the money was real.

Money was what mattered most.

Almost the moment she made her decision, her phone vibrated in her pocket. She instinctively pulled it out and saw a notification from her banking app: Incoming funds, 50,000 yuan.

Money? Real money?!

All she’d done was curse out Baldy Li, and fifty thousand yuan landed in her account?

Her heart still pounded wildly, but now it was not from the fear of death, but the wild thrill of survival.

Cursing people… could really prolong her life?

And… paid her?

Staring at Li Hao, who looked ready to explode, Ruan Mianmian felt, for the first time, the pent-up bitterness of countless sleepless nights finally vented in full.

She even grinned, flashing a look of pure provocation and mischief at that liver-red face.

A corporate drone’s life is still a life!

Then, the vast office echoed with Li Hao’s pig-like squeal: “Ruan Mianmian! You’re fired! Get out! Out, right now!”

Hands on her hips, Ruan Mianmian stood her ground and stared him down. “You have no right to fire me. It was your mistakes that forced me to work overtime and nearly cost me my life. You were the one who started shouting at me. I haven’t violated any company policy or made any serious mistakes. If you think you can fire me, have HR send me an official notice—we’ll proceed strictly according to the law!”

Li Hao, nearly apoplectic, spun in circles on the spot. The few hairs left on his head looked about ready to stand on end.

He jabbed a finger at her, sputtering, “You… you… you… just wait! I’ll make sure you’re out of here!”

With that, Li Hao stormed back to his office, stomping so hard it seemed the floor might crack.

Ruan Mianmian muttered derisively at his retreating back, “Stupid baldy!”

No sooner had she vented than she collapsed into her chair, limp and trembling.

She had only done all that to save her own life, running on pure adrenaline as she faced down Baldy Li. Now, the aftershock set in, and she worried he really would find a way to ruin her.

But jobs weren’t easy to come by these days—she couldn’t just leave. None of this was her fault.

If she lost her job, she could already imagine her mother nagging her to death for the sake of her brother!