Chapter Fifty: But You Are Not One of Them

Her feelings suddenly became tangled and complex, impossible to sort out. Why was it that she could let go, could ignore the truth or falsehood of his words, only for him to turn around and be honest with her? She would have preferred if he had never regarded her as someone worth telling the truth to—then she could have gone on pretending without a trace of guilt.

But now, in this moment, it seemed she could no longer do so.

The last rays of the setting sun spilled over Sifang Street, while the bonfire flickered and swayed gently. As they descended the mountain, Xiaoxiao found herself overwhelmed by her own emotions. Ying was walking ahead, arm in arm with Brother Han, a sight that drew envious glances from passersby. The street was crowded with tourists, so packed that Lin Shuo and Xiaoxiao were pushed closer and closer together. Several times, Xiaoxiao's shoulder bumped into Lin Shuo's chest. Instinctively, he reached out to steady her, but she always dodged his touch, making a point of it, each time murmuring a polite thank you.

After this had happened a few times, Lin Shuo became a little annoyed. With one corner of his mouth raised in curiosity, he asked, "You keep dodging me, so why do you still thank me?"

Thinking quickly, Xiaoxiao replied, "Thank you for being willing to bring me out here to talk business, even though I haven't actually seen you do any talking."

Both their words carried a hint of irony, the same kind of duplicity—hanging out a sheep's head while selling dog meat. They exchanged knowing nods and smiled at each other, each harboring their own secrets.

"Why didn't you explain about your trip to Vietnam?" In the end, Xiaoxiao couldn't keep it in—she was desperate to know Lin Shuo's real intentions. Was it really, as she suspected, nothing more than a ploy to stir her jealousy?

Lin Shuo shot back, "Then why didn't you explain what happened between you and Xi Mintang?"

He hit the mark—perhaps, in a way, they were thinking exactly the same things. Claiming there was no need for explanations was just a facade, an attempt at cool indifference; deep down, neither of them was as open or unaffected as they pretended.

With the score even, Xiaoxiao saw clearly that Lin Shuo was anything but simple. He understood that offense could be the best defense; she had never been a match for him. Yet she was no slouch herself—she knew when to stop while ahead. "Very well. Now we're even."

"Smart. Giving each other a way out is always better than backing someone into a corner."

"You're too kind. I'm really not that clever—I've never known how to give people a way out. But luckily you always find one for yourself."

Lin Shuo was taken aback for a moment, but inwardly he was delighted. He was used to people treating him with deference, so this kind of irreverence, this willingness to challenge him, was rare and even precious. All the more so because his feelings for Xiaoxiao had always been different from those he held for anyone else.

Without realizing it, they wandered into a quiet alleyway. It was only then that Xiaoxiao noticed Brother Han and Ying had disappeared somewhere along the way. As she looked around, she spotted a courtyard with its doors wide open, its architecture a typical example of Lijiang Naxi style. What set it apart from the others was its festive decoration—it looked like a wedding hall. Unable to resist the temptation, Xiaoxiao stepped inside. Red silk was draped beneath the eaves, and camel bells at the corners chimed sweetly in the wind, their melodious sound like an incantation that made one pause and linger. Looking up, she saw the courtyard’s sky was crisscrossed with red silk, blocking most of the light, but through the gaps she could still catch glimpses of the sunset’s afterglow. From the distance, faint strains of ancient Dongba music drifted in. Everything seemed perfectly arranged, and she found a smile rising to her lips without even realizing it.

Lin Shuo stood with his arms folded, his eyes fixed on Xiaoxiao's look of astonishment and wonder. The red silk cast its glow on her face, making her appear at once romantic and vibrant. He lost himself in the moment, as if appreciating a painting, silently matching the distant, elusive music with the most fitting scene in his mind.

"I remember you used to smile a lot," he said, his tone full of wistfulness. "You don't anymore."

Xiaoxiao was jolted out of her reverie by his words, forcing a smile that didn’t reach her eyes. "That's just because you don’t see me very often."

"It's a pity," he replied.

Clearly, Lin Shuo's words left Xiaoxiao bewildered—and, unexpectedly, a little sad. On impulse, she asked, "There are so many people who make me happy—why aren’t you one of them?"

Lonely moments are no time for talk of love—Chapter Fifty: Yet You Are Not One of Them—complete.